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Chivalry-Now
Standards
Chivalry-Now
needs to be safeguarded from those who would exploit or
ruin its intent. It is too important to our culture. Too dear
to what is best in us all.
While it is right to make our beliefs
and efforts known, we must do so in the best way possible.
The following Standards are meant to serve as guidelines in
that regard. As men of chivalry, we must make every effort
to protect it in everything we do.
Personal
Standards
Once
you accept the mantle of Chivalry-Now, your behavior
reflects on everything that we believe. People will judge
our beliefs by everything you say and do. Here you will be
tested, and your self-discipline tried. For this is what chivalry
is all about, your personal performance.
- Be
kind to all people.
- Be
wary of your responsibility toward women. They have fought
long and hard for their virtues to be recognized. Always
respect them as your equal.
- When
appropriate, speak the truth clearly and unafraid. Avoid
being rude or self-righteous. Listen to others carefully
and be open to correction.
Religion
Care
must be taken to make Chivalry-Now relevant to
people of any faith, or no religion at all. No matter what
your religious affiliation, you are charged to accept the
sincerity and good intentions of people of all beliefs. Especially
among the Companions, who will accept you as a sibling.
Rituals
Rituals
have their value in recognizing and participating in the
mystery of life, and Chivalry-Now is no exception.
- For
every meeting of Companions, whether in friendship, discussion
groups, administration or workshops, whenever possible,
an empty chair will be present. This chair represents those
who have come before us, and those who have yet to come—the
past and the future. Like the Siege Perilous of the
Round Table, it also represents the missing perfection
we have not achieved.
- Light
a candle, when possible, at the start of every gathering.
The fire represents male energy, dissipating light and warmth
into a world otherwise lost in the darkness of ignorance.
Promotional
Guidelines
It
is our duty to protect the integrity of Chivalry-Now from
any influence that would degrade it, no matter how innocently.
With that in mind, the following guidelines were prepared:
- Chivalry-Now
should
be viewed as each person's inheritance, but no one's possession.
It recognizes no leader or figurehead, but only the integrity
of each person's search for truth.
- As
much as possible, the promotion of Chivalry-Now should
avoid marketing techniques that would portray it as a fad
or cult or cheapen it with superficiality. We have seen
how media and marketing strategies have degraded both politics
and religion. To reduce our efforts to sound-bites would
automatically destroy its depth. We desire to promote deep
thinking. Chivalry-Now is not entertainment, and
should not be treated as such.
- Chivalry-Now
is best transmitted from one person to another through the
written word, discussion and personal example. It is best
to seek transmission through direct relationships: father
to son, friend to friend, sibling to sibling, teacher to
student, mentor to adolescent. True leaders do not preach
Chivalry-Now, they inspire it through everything
they do.
- Never
trivialize the tenets of Chivalry-Now. Always remember
that they reflect what is sacred in human nature. By profaning
them, we profane the very best of who we are.
- Whenever
a circle meeting is formed, whether it be a discussion
group, workshop or chivalric community, it must be taken
seriously. Each person in the circle serves as parent, sibling,
child and friend to all the rest. Help should always be
extended to a brother or sister in need.
- The
circle represents the dynamic of the Round Table,
formed when warriors first gathered around a fire and contemplated
who they were. Each sits equal to the other, without preference
or dominant position.
- Group
leaders facilitate the process and nothing more. There is
no formal leadership here. No person has a right to shame
or control another within the circle. Chivalry-Now
should never be imposed on anyone. It has to come from each
person's heart, or it does not exist. Promoting or contributing
to a "follow the leader" mentality is contrary
to self-growth.
- Humility
is important when discussing the virtues of Chivalry-Now.
No one exemplifies our ideals perfectly, and we are all
in need of learning and personal growth. Chivalry-Now
cannot flourish alongside pride, stubbornness and authoritarianism.
- The
purpose of a group leader is to awaken what lies dormant
in the hearts of others, rather than teach, dictate or cajole.
Stimulate thought. Ask pertinent questions. Challenge preconceived
ideas. Unveil illusions for what they are. Refine personal
convictions. Honor and promote civility and fairness. Avoid
jargon and two dimensional clichés that might portray
Chivalry-Now as frivolous or outdated. If Chivalry-Now
is not relevant to the moment, than it is not relevant at
all.
- Always
respect each person's perception of truth, which arises
from his or her own personal journey.
- Utilize
Ground Rules to structure group participation:
- It
is important to observe rules of courtesy and respect
during our time together.
- Let
every person be allowed to speak without interruption.
- Listen
to who is speaking. Don't just wait until the speaker
is finished.
- No
one should be forced to speak.
- Express
your point quickly and clearly without grandstanding.
Our aim is to create a dialog, not be preached at.
- Limit
the time you speak so that others might contribute as
well.
- Stay
on topic until a consensus seems ready to move on.
- Do
not belittle anyone's opinion, or be insulting. Apologize
whenever this rule is breached.
- Do
not judge a person by one set of opinions.
- If
conflict arises due to politics ro religion, the discussion
topic should be change or terminated.
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